The adult role in a self-directed learning environment (as mentioned two weeks ago) is totally different from traditional or even progressive school settings. This is one of the main reasons I don't own (accept) the title "teacher." On the other hand, I know other colleagues in the Liberated Learner Network who happily embrace it - therefore, this is definitely a personal preference. Just plain Maria is fine - but sometimes, they call me mom or, more recently, "grandma!" (What??? I mean - I am old enough to be their grandparent - but OUCH!) By spending my days listening closely to their stories and (sometimes) non-verbal cues, I provide the resources they need to pursue their interests and aspirations. Together, we create a safe, often loud and chaotic, richly diverse environment filled with funny, serious, creative, curious, fiercely independent, playful, shy, and colorful personalities - all excited about learning. I am a facilitator - a direct support person - the one adult they know for a fact will always have their back. They know I trust them unequivocally to make the choices best for them, and they trust me - to be their sounding board, guide, and champion. For example, this year, we have one teen - who suffers from severe anxiety to the point that they are (mostly) mute and spend their days in the office away from the other kids - reading and petting Digby. In the beginning, this situation made me feel really uncomfortable. I felt ineffectual in my inability to help. Then, a few weeks ago, I received a note from their mom thanking me for providing that safe space for her child, and she didn't know what they would do if it wasn't for DRC. Now, I engage with them while I work on projects and admin tasks by chatting occasionally without anticipating a response - simply letting them be without judgment or external expectations. It is what they need - at this moment. On Friday, I asked this teen if they would like to draw Halloween scenes on some of the treat bags we are handing out at the Jamboree next week. At the end of the day, they handed me two bags with drawings worthy of framing and hanging in a gallery. Holy Moly! This kid is talented! They beamed when I told them just that. On my way home, I stopped at the SLU Brewer Bookstore to purchase a sketchpad, a good quality drawing pencil, and a kneadable eraser - that I will present to them on Monday. I can't wait to see the beauty they produce with those simple tools. Oftentimes, we have absolutely no idea what impact we have on the young people we spend our days with. I can only hope they see (understand) their potential as clearly as I do. And I guess at the end of the day - that defines my role best - trusting, providing the spark of hope and optimism, and sitting back and watching the magic happen before my eyes. DRC News Halloween Jamboree - Oct. 28th - 12 - 6 at the Canton VFW - Gouverneur St. Join DRC Staff, Board, & Families for amazing music featuring local legends: Ron, Josh & Valerie Kirkpatrick, George Dodds, Carter Houk, Don Woodcock, and Jay Seymour, as well as many musical friends including DRC's Chris Raymo and his son. Listen to the music while your kids have a blast in the Halloween Fun Zone with arts & crafts, games, toys, face painting & treat bags for the first 75 kids to arrive. Costumes are welcome (for all ages)! This is a fundraising event for Deep Root Center with donation at the door, food concession, bake sale, silent auction, craft fair featuring the DRC Etsy Shop Creators, 50/50 Raffle, & DRC Swag. Contact maria@deeprootcenter for more info. There will be a jam session and opportunity for Karaoke between 6-9. Please share this event widely! Hope to see you there! Photos from a busy week at both Centers!
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A non-coercive environment where people follow their interests is the hallmark of self-directed education. There is no prescribed curriculum or grand plan. Each child, with unique interests and aspirations, determines what they will explore each day. Curiosity, creativity, and the joy of discovery through play are celebrated. But if kids play all day, what are they learning? This question comes up often because play is considered frivolous while work is honored. If it isn’t hard you aren’t “doing” anything and it certainly isn’t worth your time. We know that being forced to learn something that holds no interest through rote exercises does not guarantee that it is retained. Studies indicate compulsory exercises in memorization of colors, shapes, letters, etc., at a young age (preschool) are detrimental and hinder later learning. But the same also goes for the rest of us. If something is not enjoyable, stressful, or painful – our brains have a mechanism that shuts it down. Learning is natural. Kids want to learn. The best way we (adults) can flat-line any learning experience is to butt in and make it a “teachable moment.” Back to the question - what are they learning if we don’t provide a structured compulsory curriculum?
These attributes will allow anyone to gather the essential information they need to thrive - in this world. And what one person considers necessary is not universal. At the core of this philosophy is that we celebrate each unique individual with their remarkable skills, talents, interests, and needs. Next week, I will discuss adults and their role in a self-directed learning environment. DRC News More good news on the fundraising front: Thank you to American Legion Post #79 in Massena for their $500 donation to support our kids. The Oct. 28th Jamboree is coming together! You will see "blurbs" about it in local papers and events pages. Besides amazing live music performed by local legends, we will have a Halloween fun zone for the kids with games, toys, face-painting, arts & crafts, and treats. Costumes are welcome! This is a fundraising event with donations accepted at the door. There will be a silent auction, food concession, 50/50 raffle, bake sale, and a craft fair featuring items from our Etsy Store creators. Please plan on joining us at the Canton VFW! A few photos from this week:
Over the next few weeks, I will focus on self-directed, free-range educational philosophy - unless I get distracted (pissed off) by something and go off-topic to rant about it (like that ever happens). Today, I start with trust. Every child is capable (period - full-stop). Trusting that they each know themselves thoroughly and understand what they need to thrive, with the ability to seek those things out and follow through, is the foundation on which self-directed learning philosophy is built. Our culture leads us to believe the opposite. It is ingrained in our practices and system. Kids are empty vessels meant to be filled up by adults who are keepers of knowledge. They are lazy and will do the very least they can get away with and will only do something for a reward or to avoid punishment. Without that inherent trust in children - education becomes teacher-led, not self-directed. Though many are Progressive Educational programs, they are not the same. ( Peter Gray, a developmental psychologist, explains this concept beautifully here in this article from Psychology Today.) This is about the point I hear all the "buts."
Weekly Creative Meditation
DRC News This week we had a few pieces of good news in terms of our fundraising efforts. Thank you to the Potsdam Walmart for funding our Community Grant Request with a $500.00 check. We are grateful for their continued support of our programs.
Jamboree News Save the date: Oct. 28th from 12-6 (or until we are done) - DRC families will be holding a Jamboree at the Canton VFW to benefit DRC. Featuring: Ron Kirkpatrick & George Dodds - with Josh & Valerie Kirkpatrick, Carter Houk, Fiddle champion, Don Woodcock, Jay Seymour, and several other NoCo musicial legends, including DRC's very own Chris Raymo and his son Christian. The event will include a food concession, DRC kids and their Etsy store creations, a silent auction, and a Halloween Party for the younger set including a "Trunk or Treat" opportunity, face painting, an arts and crafts table and the opportunity to play with Lego, wooden blocks, and assorted toys. If you have something you would be willing to donate for our silent auction - please let us know. We are looking forward to partying with our NoCo friends and raising some serious dollars for DRC! And finally some photos from the week.
Competition is the backbone of society. Upon close observation, every aspect of capitalistic ideology is founded on contest. Bigger, faster, stronger, smarter, and the most compliant wins - the game, the reward, resources, wealth, and, possibly more importantly, the social status -closely intertwined with wealth, power, privilege, and entitlement. Life (itself) becomes a contest of who you know and, along with it, the prestige of influence. This ultimately leads to inequities (on all levels). And is, what I believe, the most blatantly obvious - but under-identified/acknowledged symptom of society. Why this thought process (rant) - now? Frankly, it is always simmering just below the surface, emitting a low-pitched hum of annoyance. However, it was brought to the forefront (and became a frustrated scream) when I learned last Friday that another grant I had spent hours writing was not funded. Because, by promising to serve whoever needs us no matter the amount they can pay, we need the dollars for everything (including basic operations, not a "special" program or project), which means we cannot be sustainable without an influx of money. Yes, it was another punch in the gut - disappointing and discouraging - on many levels. Not the least of which is the realization that I am out there (in good faith) battling for "our" kids (student members) every single day. And because they (and their families), for the most part, are the ones who don't have wealth, privilege, entitlement, influence, or power and do not comply, they are the traumatized pawns of a system that does not work for them. DRC means the world to these kids, quite literally. It is the only place where they have been accepted as themselves within a diverse community and where they may even begin to imagine a positive future while exploring their interests within our safe, supportive environment. With the failure of this latest grant - the most frustrating feeling is understanding that, to the detriment of these kids (currently 48), we have not found a way to be financially stable - even after nearly ten years and full rosters - with a solid reputation in the community - simply because we are forced to participate in an inequitable competition for dollars. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News For the above reason - we are in full-on fundraising mode. If you believe that DRC is an asset in the community and provides a valuable service - you can help keep us alive in the following ways: Make a one-time or monthly donation. Sponsorship - share this opportunity with any person, business, or organization in the NoCo who is dedicated to supporting their local community. Volunteer your time - we are always looking for folks to share their interests and passions with our kiddos, or if you have fundraising skills - we would appreciate your hands-on help. Purchase items from our Amazon Wishlist and they will get sent directly to us. Order DRC swag from our Printify shop. If you frequent a restaurant and believe they would be willing to have a DRC day where a percentage of the "take" would come to us - please consider asking them if they would be open to it. Plan on attending our upcoming Jamboree, on Oct. 28th at the VFW - presented by one of our families - more info to follow next week. This past week we had limited attendance at both Centers due to sickness - but the kiddos who were there were fully engaged in conversation, activities, and projects that fed their (and our) spirit. Note of Days of Operation Change at DRC-East: Now open Tuesday - Friday, from 9-3, each week.
Yes, indeed - my thoughts once again came out as a creative piece. I am getting better at going with the flow... DRC News Our second week was chock full of kids at both Centers engaged and connected with each other while exploring their individual interests. The days passed in the blink of an eye, and I was not paying close enough attention to hear any particular quote of note for this week's DRC Story.
However, BL wanted me to use my utterance upon hearing from a parent that another Yeti water bottle was missing - "We are being invaded by Yetis this year." He found it especially amusing and chuckled about it for a good portion of Monday morning. I often refer to DRC as an all-inclusive community. Everyone who wants to join us is welcome. Becoming part of a community comes with innumerable and clear perks - arguably, the most important is the innate sense of belonging. However, as a society, we don't often talk about the responsibilities each person carries along with the benefits. Everyone gets to be themselves and do what they need to feel safe - but their needs and desires are no more important than anyone else. Respect is our one rule, and the very best definition we have come up with is - we take care of each other, and you can't do that if you ignore, judge, or make demands of others. Therein lies the tension and where (sometimes) difficult, uncomfortable (that we want to avoid), and open conversation, amongst all ages, is the key to a thriving, diverse, and dynamic community - where individual growth within the group is the ultimate goal. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News Wow, it was a busy first week at both Centers of kiddos getting reacquainted and welcoming new faces to the crews. I seem to be having trouble articulating (wrestling and wrangling) my thoughts into their typical Sunday morning format. Once again, I am allowing the process to guide me to free-form them into something a bit more creative. Enjoy! DRC News Our first day at both Centers is tomorrow - September 11th. We are excited to be back to welcome our returning kiddos as well as those who have recently joined us. Currently the Canton Center is filled to the brim with 28 kids (expected to be 30 by the end of the week) and DRC-East in Massena has 17 (expected to be 18) before long.
We are looking forward to a year filled with unlimited opportunities for exploration and amazing individual growth. Stay tuned for photo dumps next week and more exciting news from each of the Centers. You can support our work to provide the facilities and environment our kids need to acquire these life skills by contributing financially (you can do that to honor someone as four families from around the country did to celebrate my mother-in-law's life), sponsor a DRC Kiddo, share this blog each week, volunteer at one of the Centers, join our Board or a fundraising committee, or purchase an item from our Amazon Wish-list. Thank you! When you are in the midst of something hard - like really, really hard, it feels like it will go on forever - with no end in sight. But then, one day, it does --- just stop - leaving a huge empty space for yet another difficult thing to reside. I am slowly learning through all the hard things - waiting till life gets easier to follow through on a dream or a quest - or to simply be happy - is a colossal waste of precious time. Here come the cliches - galloping in hard and fast... Live life to the fullest - authentically with gratitude. Intentionally choose joyfulness. Treat others with respect, generosity, and kindness, without judgement. Life is hard enough - why be an @$$ and make it harder for other folks? Because --- tomorrow is never guaranteed, and karma is a b*tch. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News Unbelievably, it is time to start another year. Both Centers will be open Monday Sept. 11th.
We look forward to another awesome year. More news to follow in the coming weeks as we get back into the swing of things. In the meantime, you can check out all of the swag in our Printify shop. Thank you for indulging me as this week's blog takes the form of a Creative Meditation as a tender goodbye to my husbands' beloved mom. Until next week, stay safe and be well.
This summer, I have learned a few things:
DRC News Summer Program begins next Monday the 21st. There are still a few spots left - register today.
Showing up for yourself and others is at the very center of what it means to be human. But yet, it is often the hardest thing to do. Whether you come from a background that didn't teach it as a core value or are neurodivergent and experience executive dysfunction, your inability to manifest showing up is often the consequence. I don't want to suggest that not showing up is acceptable or inevitable - simply because it is hard. Industry, determination, authenticity, creativity, acts of kindness, and dedication to your community and your personal tribe are all traits that you can learn and, in the end, be most proud of. But how do we teach the skill of showing up?
Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News The merch list has expanded with some new designs - take a peek. Every item you order supports DRC. https://deep-root-center.printify.me/products
Every one of us, at one time or another, has hit a brick wall. There are always a few options - come to a dead stop (give up the dream) or find a way - over, under, around, or through those bricks. But what are the key characteristics of those folks who persevere - no matter what? Some would probably claim that grit, willpower, and discipline are the most important. To a very small degree, I would agree - however, I believe the following four traits are even more imperative:
Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News DRC Swag Exciting news! The DRC merch shop is open! I am in the process of populating it with all-new designs for t-shirts, hoodies, and hats. Let us know if there is a particular item you would like with the DRC logo. Check it out here: https://deep-root-center.printify.me/products You get great-looking swag, and your purchases support DRC. DRC Board and Fundraising Committees DRC is looking for folks who are happiest when they are creating and exploring outside-the-box ideas to join our board or sit on our fundraising committees. We need help sustaining and growing our unique presence in the NoCo. Our flexibility and commitment to diversity generate an ideal environment for folks who value collaboration over competition in our community. Please get in touch if you would like to help. Summer Program - Register here
I have been contemplating the concept of legacies since the Supreme Court ruled against affirmative action, and during my children's visit home for the first time in a very long time and while I was writing a grant with the potential to be a game changer for DRC. I thought about it on the macro level - how birthrights are the root of gross societal inequity and injustice (as evidenced by the judges of the high court who gutted the precedent of the past 60+ years); and, more importantly, on the individual level - how each of us leaves a legacy that is often the direct opposite of entitlement. In terms of the latter, for the past five months, as one of her caretakers, I have been a direct witness to a matriarch who, despite her (terribly unfair) illness (which has literally taken her voice and much of her mobility), still retains her enduring spark of life as evidenced by her contagious humor (and giggles), generosity, gratitude, intelligence, positivity, and familial devotion. Her children, grandchildren, and friends are abundantly aware of how fortunate they are to receive these beautiful gifts as their living legacy. While writing the grant, I had to explain DRC's value to our wider community and why we consider ourselves successful. I realized in the midst of laboring over the concise 150-word answers that these could be defined as our legacy - and it is embedded in our commitment to being the only non-coercive, safe, flexible educational environment in the NoCo that works with any child who needs us, no matter their family's financial situation, which has created a diverse community to be proud of. Our success is defined by our ability to take their interests and aspirations and use them as the basis for their learning plans - which ultimately leads to happy kids excited about learning and exploring new possibilities. It sounds cheesy and unrealistic when faced with our current reality; nevertheless, we all have the opportunity to consciously and purposely, with gratitude and humility, find (be) the good in every situation and work toward making the world a better place. How would you define your legacy if you had to explain it in 150 words or less? Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News Register today!
Fifty-three weeks ago, I wrote an intensely personal blog post entitled A Love Letter. In that post, I documented my journey of discovering that I am neurodivergent - specifically autistic. (I now understand that ADHD is a large part of the mix too.) During this past year, I have spent a goodly amount of time coming to terms with what this delayed discovery meant to my past self and how it affected that person. And what it means now and to my future self. As mentioned in previous posts, I have always felt like an alien in this world - I have masked (or tried to) all my weirdness - all the eccentricities, all the sensitivities, and all the internal chaos. I can't say I was trying to be accepted or "normal" - cause that isn't the case. I simply didn't want to be noticed - ever. Invisibility was my life-long goal. Masking became my "normal" - I didn't know how to set boundaries or ask for what I needed - mainly because I didn't even know what those boundaries or needs were. My internal landscape was as much a mystery to me as it was to everyone else. What I know now is that binding yourself so tightly within a facade of OK-ness can only lead to overwhelming feelings of frustration and irritation that simmer and boil over to hurt the people you love most. With that knowledge, I am trying to be more conscious of being truly authentic - allowing myself to tell folks when I am feeling overwhelmed, asking for what I need, and removing myself from situations that make me what to crawl out of my skin - without apologizing. The funny thing is, the more I embrace all those wild eccentricities that inhabit this incredible neurodivergent brain, the more confident I am in being myself and showing all my wondrous weirdness to the world. Circling this concept back to my life's mission, every child deserves to feel like they can fully express themselves without masking, hiding, or feeling shame for simply experiencing the world differently. They should not have to wait fifty-seven and one-half years (or forever) before they, too, feel free to joyfully say, "What you see is what you get," without remorse or fear of ridicule or punishment. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News Fundraising & Grants We are always seeking innovative ways to raise funds for DRC. Our needs are many. We require funds to: hire and pay staff a living wage, pay off the mortgage and renovate and expand the Canton Center, find and purchase a new home for the Massena Center, and all of the other things on the list of any other not-for-profit.
If you have any ideas for grants or other fundraising endeavors, or are interested in joining the fundraising committee, please get in touch. We are also seeking dynamic, energetic, outside the box thinking folks to join our Board. Thank you! Did you just read the title in that whiny child voice that echoes through every parent's head and strikes fear in their hearts? It is such a dreadfully annoying utterance many cave and become the ringmaster of their very own three-ring circus for two months - simply because those cranky, fractious voices send them over the edge. And they are afraid bored kids lead to dull minds and laziness. (Or, maybe our Puritanical roots are to blame - we fear that "idle hands are the devil's workshop.") What if I told you there was a way to increase your child's creativity, imagination, and problem-solving skills without managing an over-the-top, exhausting schedule that only serves as a stop-gap? It is really quite simple - try saying "good" as your only response to "I'm bored." And then walk away, turn up the volume on your earbuds, or bury yourself in your own creative activity. Here's the layman's explanation of the science behind that one-word reply: our brain needs downtime - it allows the gears in the background to begin turning and the accumulated experiences, thoughts, and stored knowledge, time to coalesce into really cool ideas or solutions to a problem it is working on. This phenomenon is sometimes referred to as an "aha moment." Kids don't require "canned" (pre-chewed activities) or busyness to survive. In fact, they are better served by slowing down, being "bored," and allowing their extraordinary brains to run rampant - giving them time to experiment, explore, and play. That, for some, is a scary thought. Because all that untethered creativity is quite often unpredictable and really, really messy. We tend to forget that uncertainty, chaos, and disorder are where creativity and learning collide, leading to unbound innovation and discovery. Let them be bored and stand back to watch in amazement as their creativity, imagination, and problem-solving skills soar. It is well worth the mess and those few moments of cringy discomfort upon hearing that dreaded two-word declaration this summer. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
,Stay tuned for Fundraising News - we are planning a Craft Fair in Massena in August. We will have details within the next week. In the meantime you can help keep DRC alive by contributing on our donation page or purchasing an item on our Amazon wishlist. It will be sent directly to us.
Thank you! Happy 4th of July! With hindsight being 20/20 - when you look back at all the things you didn't do because you were afraid --- which of those things would you do now? On the one hand, fearfulness keeps us safe from all(!) the stupidly dangerous stuff; on the other, it stops us from exploring and discovering all the experiences that may be positively life-changing. And within that statement lays the paradox. The goal is to find the balance. I think part of the problem can be found in the trendiness of using fear as a motivator - FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is one prime example. The refusal to embrace change or try something new - while they might seem on the opposite end of FOMO is motivated by fear as well. We, humans, are very good at making excuses for staying in situations or doing things (keeping up with the Joneses) that are not conducive to our well-being - physical, mental, or our future selves. And insisting that those around us remain stuck too - because - what if... fill in the blank with every negative outcome you can imagine. Or - what if you discovered that by simply opening your mind, you would begin generating fresh, original, and innovative ideas and, in the process, find deep joy and satisfaction and help others find theirs. Fear stops creativity in its tracks - whereas confidence cracks us wide open to imagine all the possibilities that life can be. I invite you to find your sweet spot within the paradox. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News We are still assessing the feasibility of offering an after school program at the Canton Center. If you need after school care or know of someone who is looking - please complete the afternoon program interest form found here.
DRC's afternoon program is completely flexible. We offer drop in options and we charge less than any other after school program in the area. ... stupid, dense, or thick-headed - not by a long shot! I am so very sorry if that is the internalized story you have been telling yourself when you consider doing something particularly challenging but stop because you are triggered by traumatic memories of failure or ridicule. The cultural standard of pathologizing, labeling, judging, and pointing out deficits and inadequacies has produced a large population of self-doubters who are deathly afraid of experimenting, getting creative, and trying something new - because they may be wrong or screw up or punished for simply stepping outside the box of tradition and conformity. Every single one of us holds deep inside a capacity for brilliance. None of us share the same talents, skills, challenges, or life experiences as anyone else in this whole wide world. As I see it, the only way forward is to embrace a new paradigm that highlights each individual's positive characteristics, celebrates their innate abilities, interests, and intense curiosity, honors their struggles, and guides them to discover their very own hacks for overcoming obstacles to do the things they want to do. Join me in creating a reality where authenticity, uniqueness, and originality are the new standard of excellence. And where every child (person) is excited to try something new and challenging because they believe wholeheartedly (and fiercely) in themselves and their abilities. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
Several wisps of ideas have drifted into my consciousness at various moments this past week but only flitted through long enough for me to realize they were there - none of them landed long enough to settle in, get cozy, and inspire a post. Over these past ten years, I have learned not to struggle and fight - to write something only to get words on a page or force all the creative sparks into an uncomfortable pattern when they are making it abundantly clear they desire a brief vacation. This is my brain shouting, take a rest - and this time, I will listen. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
Doing the work that needs to be done - not for profit or the glory - simply because you see the need for your particular talent or skill set and want to help however you can. Sociologists would probably consider this utopia - a society where everyone works and plays together for the good of all - and where everyone is taken care of. There are places in the world where this concept exists, but I can only imagine it is most likely dying out. Native South Africans, as well as other African cultures, call it Ubuntu. And it is the antithesis of Capitalism. You see, you can't make excessive (stupid) amounts of money when folks are committed to sharing their skills and resources to help each other. This is why I am always super impressed and excited to work with people who see a problem or a niche to be filled and dive in to create a unique solution. These folks are incredibly passionate about doing the good work for the benefit of all. Not because they see a path to riches but because they genuinely care and want to help others who are also doing good work. I recently met someone accomplishing just that, and it is inspiring to know that the fundamental desire to help is still alive and well. Any of us can step up, fill a gap, create something, share our beautifully authentic gifts, and without a doubt, change the world - together! Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
As an ongoing fundraiser, DRC will be holding monthly raffles - our last payout was $870. Stay-tuned to learn how you can buy a chance to win.
Today as we finish another academic year, this post is dedicated to all the folks who commit their time, dollars, and emotional support to me and Deep Root Center. If it wasn't for them, DRC would not exist. Friday, as Karen was leaving our final gathering of the 22/23 year, she said, "You are driven to do this." I, of course, protested. But she insisted that because DRC is "my baby," I am dedicated to its survival in a different way than others. And I understand what she means - to a point. Within the exhaustion, frustration, and, yes, deep anger, I am driven to help as many kids as I can - escape traumatic, unhealthy, or tedious educational situations - so they are free to discover the wonders and excitement of learning - as well as their own pure awesomeness. Because we all deserve that! But quite honestly, that drive is fueled by all the hordes of folks who have helped along the way these last 10(!) years. If not for them, I would have been defeated long ago. Although it may appear, from the sidelines, that this is a one-woman show, the reality could not be further from the truth. Deep gratitude to Christopher Raymo, who returned to DRC-Canton this year after a few, quite literally preserving my hide (and sanity). He is the kindest, most steadfast guy who can think on his feet, solve virtually any problem, and is adored by every kiddo at the Center. He does it all without fuss, humbly, and always with a smile. I will be forever indebted to Karen Gagne and her sidekick Trader for agreeing to return to St. Lawrence County to so very capably take on the leadership of DRC-East. She endured and shined through the move from the church in North Lawrence to the new location at the Massena Housing Authority, several kids transitioning in and out of the Center, and the multitude of everyday challenges that make up life at DRC - with kindness, unwavering dedication to the kids, and always with grace. I am grateful to the people and organizations who contribute to our bottom line - whether through seasonal donations, monthly contributions, sponsorships, grants, or support of one of our fundraisers. Quite plainly - without money, we could not do our work. Thanks to our board members - several of whom are brand new and a couple who have been here since the beginning - for taking on this enormous task of keeping DRC fiscally viable, jumping in to help with various projects, and always having my back. I greatly appreciate their support and am delighted to call them my friends. And finally, thank you to all the DRC kids and their families. If it wasn't for their willingness to "jump ship," try something completely different, and trust the process - there would be no reason for us to exist. Every kid is excited to be here, supporting each other as they learn, grow, and explore all the possibilities together. These kiddos make all of our days a little brighter. So, as we finish another year (that flew by) of amazing accomplishments - I can only say, Thank You All for sticking with me on this crazy ride! Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News Have a fantastic summer! We will be back in August for Canton Summer Program and then our Regular Programs will begin September 5th. If your family would like to join us - please get in touch. Look for our collaborative art piece at the Heritage Park Whimsical Art walk in Canton. It will open on June 10th - with a celebration and party and will remain up for two months during the summer. Thank you to Anneke L. of Grasse River Heritage for inviting DRC to participate. Thank you (so far) to Potsdam Agway, High Peaks Winery, and ABCD Hardware and Supply for hosting DRC donation buckets. Please support these community minded businesses and while you are there - drop a little love in our buckets. Thank you! "Go explore and have fun" are the last words I say to every kid (teen) after talking with them and taking notes to write their IHIP (homeschool plan) - whether they are planning to be "in-person" at one of the Centers or are one of the many kids I help through consultation. Why? Very simply, because they need to hear that learning is enjoyable and is all about individual interests and discovery. And more importantly - most of these kids, like many adults, have had the complete opposite experience. For a large portion, it is, at best, drudgery - and at worst - excruciatingly painful (myself included). We know that the brain shuts down under stress and discomfort - which means expecting anyone to learn under pressurized, one-size-fits-all, coercive conditions is beyond ridiculous. Science backs up the integral connection between learning and fun. Play and the inherent joy of natural exploration - ignite creativity, problem-solving skills, and all of that pure awesomeness within each of us. My instructions will always stand - go - explore, have fun, and in the process you will most likely learn something new today. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
This coming Friday is our final day of this academic year. Both Centers will be celebrating with a field trip to my house in the woods to play and roast hotdogs and marshmallows over a campfire. Enjoy this photo dump from this past week.
*Author note: This is a heavily revised and updated post from February 2019. The basic premise has not changed in these four years - however, the state of the world is drastically different. Beyond free-range and non-coercive, the word I use most often to describe the DRC environment is “safe.” Our student members are building a dynamic, ever-evolving community as new kids join us and others leave, where they learn and grow together. Their only formal guide is our community agreement: Respect yourself, each other, and this place. Our kids can feel safe to be themselves here because we are all taking care of each other. This agreement is all-encompassing in its simplicity. When they make that promise to each other at DRC, they hold themselves and each other accountable for their behaviors and actions. And within that, they embrace and celebrate all the quirks and idiosyncrasies that make them amazingly authentic individuals. Some would say, “But, how is that helping them - won’t they expect to be protected everywhere? You can’t shield them from reality.” I will argue - that isn’t the point! So often, kids unintentionally present themselves as targets because they feel inferior, defeated, or just plain sad. They emit an unconscious signal of defenselessness to those who will, without a second thought, take advantage of their personally perceived weakness. In our role as mentors, we model curiosity, attentiveness to others, honesty, assertiveness, and confidence that are grounded in kindness, humor, and humility, unselfish personal motivation, and strength that has flexibility - but above all, we encourage them to embrace their gifts and to be gentle, trusting spirits without becoming vulnerable targets. In doing so, we teach them to take responsibility for mistakes and use them as guides. And to respond to bullying with a calm, poised demeanor – to walk away from any maliciously inspired conflict with confidence and compassion. Then when they go out into that competitive world where some people use manipulation, retaliation, cruelty, and vindictiveness, to “win” life, they can use the lessons they have learned here and (hopefully) be unafraid to navigate (and maybe even change) the world as their purely awesome authentic selves. * Another note: Sometimes, I worry I have not done enough to help some of the seemingly more vulnerable kids - especially the ones I never felt like I built a meaningful connection with or who never allowed me close enough to connect. Recently, I saw one of those student members (he was job shadowing the plumber who came to "fix" an issue). I always thought I had failed him. He told me that after he left DRC - he took the GED prep class - and within a few months, passed the GED. He said, "If I had known I could get through HS that easily - I would have done it sooner." In hindsight, I realize that even though I did not directly support him in his endeavors, his years at DRC were, in some sense, valuable because he understood that he was in charge of the next step and all he had to do was take it. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
Our Raffle fundraiser is still in full swing - purchase your ticket from any DRC Parent or Board member or get in touch with Maria or Karen. The DRC year is coming to a close. We will be finishing up the week of May 22nd with celebrations at both Centers. Enjoy the photo dump from this past week. We had a little sister visit Canton for a few days. She will be joining us in the Fall. Little Sis ate a "zebra cake" while making cupcakes, cracked the eggs for it, went fishing, and generally had a fantastic time with the crew! Let us know if you have a little one who would be interested in checking us out. Happy Mother's Day to all who have nurtured and supported young people and will continue to do so - most especially my Mom, Sharon, my MIL, Bonnie, and all the other folks who have loved and encouraged me through the years.
"How we learn has nothing to do with how brilliant we are." - Henry Winkler Virginia G., DRC's newest board member, and volunteer at DRC-East, sent me this quote on Monday with the note that I should use it in my next blog post. So - here you go... Mr. Winkler' observation is spot on. As individuals, we all learn differently - and as the research catches up to what those of us in the neurodivergent world have understood all along - each of us is utterly brilliant. Every single one of us excels in something (if not many things). Education - is simply providing the resources and support each child (person) needs (asks for) to explore their natural interests and ambitions. In the process, all that innate brilliance is revealed, and intrinsic motivation is nurtured. This brings us to the unmistakable conclusion that: School is optional simply because learning is natural. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News This is another quote that requires the back story. When I am in the office, doing admin work, I can hear everything going on upstairs. On Monday, I heard E complaining and fussing about the computer she was using. It kept disconnecting from the internet for no apparent reason while she was attempting to participate in a multiplayer game with her friend P. Her grumbling got louder and more strident as her frustration grew. I went in and said quietly, "You realize you have the power to walk away, right? You don't have to be frustrated and angry. You have options." Then turned to go back to my desk. She took that in and then, after a few beats, stood up and picked up her doll. Not ten minutes later, I heard her repeating the essence of my message to P, who was frustrated with something in the game she was playing. This is Free Range, Self-Directed Learning in a nutshell. I didn't demand that she stop playing - I only reminded her that she had options. And because she was able to take charge of what was making her feel icky - she was able to prompt her friend with a similar message. The DRC 50/50 Raffle is in full swing. Reach out to any DRC family, Board Member, Karen or me to purchase your tickets. Check us Out
And finally, a few peeks into the past week at both Centers....
One of the many hallmarks of neurodivergence is procrastination. Before I go any further, I want to recognize that no other five-syllable word seems to carry the same burden of judgment, guilt, and negativity. With that being said, it may be the never-ending to-do list, the anxiety about the future, or the depths of hellish exhaustion (being without my thyroid meds. for two weeks did not help that situation), but whatever the case, I recently, unwittingly, began to notice, not out of shame, just observation, the role procrastination plays in my life and my emotional health. Something just clicked. I can clearly (for the most part) identify why (when) I put off particular tasks. And it seems to present itself in two very different scenarios - one helpful and the other - not so much. And that is where this anecdote comes in. As an employer, DRC remits payroll taxes. The forms and the taxes are due each quarter - one month after the quarter ends. So, in this case, today. These always represent an enormous financial hit for DRC, especially at this time of year when other important, weighty expenses are due. I knew we would be "borrowing" thousands from the Money Market account to cover these obligations. Therefore, I buried my head in the sand and put off the task till Friday morning, when I knocked it out in less than 30 minutes. Yes, it was traumatizing to transfer those funds - but hiding from the pain didn't make it easier. And crossing it off the to-do list lifted some emotional burden off my shoulders. On the other hand, procrastination is arguably the most powerful tool in my creative toolbox. When I have a kernel of an idea and sit down to write or design something, and then realize I am spending way too much time wrangling and wrestling with it - I know it hasn't finished percolating in the background and needs more time to incubate - before it is ready to come out. In most cases, I just let it simmer in the depths of that juicy creative space. The only time I force something is when I have promised someone I would have a project for them in a particular time frame. I don't normally rely on external stimuli, but in this case, it is what I need to follow through on obligations - knowing that it may not be my best effort because it didn't get enough time to develop is sometimes painful, but it is never worth making someone wait on me. Circling back, I clearly have not mastered the art of procrastination - quite yet. I don't know why that sigh of relief and the knowledge that I can usually get whatever I dread - done in very little time - is not enough to motivate me to do them moments before the deadlines. That may be the next piece of this to figure out. I'll let you know when (if) I do. In the meantime - let's all promise to give ourselves and others the grace to figure out how to leverage the art of procrastination to our advantage. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC News
This quote was overheard when walking past the computer lab/library/classroom. Later, I asked R what he was talking about. He explained that he had built an intricate map inside one of the Roblox games that anyone could use, and it took him four days to do it. This is just one example of the complexity found within the gaming world. These kids are not simply playing games - they are quite literally building/creating/designing them as they go. I can't even begin to describe the levels of understanding it takes to delve into this world and the layers of skills being developed as they play. We had a very full week at both Centers. Thank you to the group of parents & volunteers who met at DRC-East Wednesday morning to begin brainstorming fundraising ideas. And I want to take a few moments to recognize the enormous contribution the Foster/Peet crew make to DRC. The list of things they take on is endless - but the latest is these beautifully repaired steps and new hand rail. Enjoy these photo galleries from the past week.
Survival of the fittest - bigger, faster, stronger - eat or be eaten. This is the tale (we) humans have been telling ourselves for eons - or at least since Darwin and Wallace proposed their theories. (Side note: What a perfect allegory - the "winner" - who told his "story" first - forever has his name identified with the elegant theory that explains life itself, and interestingly, Darwin and Wallace were both students of economic theory.) This misguided, simplified, and mythical notion of survival of the fittest drives everything in society and upholds the concept of scarcity. The triumphant gets the prize - the loser is left with the scraps (or eaten alive). The fundamental flaw in how we use competition sits within our societal perceptions, including our definition of what makes someone the "fittest." What is the determiner of our ability to survive individually or as a species? We forget (ignore) that together as a group of diverse individuals, we are far more creative and abundantly smarter than a lone "normal" (fit) specimen dominating (scamming) the system for wealth and power. By pursuing status and the "win" through the promotion of rivalry, the innate value of cooperation (taking care of one another) is completely lost. Disproportionate inequity and injustice are the direct results of this defect. Gross surplus to the "fittest" (elite winners) and limited access to resources and support for the "unfit" (losers) will always be the default mode. To this point, kids, from birth, are indoctrinated into this toxic culture that immerses and forces them into a competition of survival of the fittest for everything from affection to grades, wins on the playing field, and social status. And punishment and reward - sticks and carrots - are the external motivators - ultimately responsible for the death of authenticity, kindness, empathy, curiosity, creativity, and the ability to work together cooperatively to make decisions and solve problems to make the world a better place for us all. Weekly Creative Meditation DRC-News DRC-East had a good week after their Spring Break. Thank you to Virginia G. and Sharon M. for coming in to spend time and share your talents with the East Peeps. Also, thanks again to former board member, Steve Hamilton - he donated a comfy couch to the East Center a few weeks ago. Afternoon Program
We are assessing interest for bring back an Afternoon Program to the Canton Center. This is a free range opportunity for young people who attend other local schools. There is a drop-in option - you only pay for the days your child attends. Please visit this page to learn more and complete the Google Form if you are interested. |
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