Most visitors, who are just learning about Deep Root Center and our philosophy, are understandably skeptical when I tell them, that on any given day, you cannot tell the difference between the kids who joined DRC a week ago from the ones who have been with us for a couple of years.  In addition, parents don’t quite understand this concept until they see their own child completely enveloped within our amazing community the day after they join us.  
 
I spend a lot of time thinking about and marveling at this particular phenomenon.  Is it the environment or is it this grouping of random kids? Perhaps it is our philosophy along with the absence of a list of finite rules.  If you asked me at this moment, based on the cohesiveness of this particular group of kids, my response would be all of the above. 
 
We work hard to create a cozy, comfortable, and non-institutional feeling space – filled with all those things you would find in your own home.  The front door opens into our “chill space,” which is set up like any living room, including the cubbies and lockers often filled to overflowing with boots, coats, and backpacks, along with stray socks, and other minutiae of everyday life.  Our kitchen, with the exception of the labels on the cupboards, is like any other, a gathering space, with open access to anyone who is hungry or wants to cook for the group.  The art room and all of the creative supplies, the music room filled with instruments, the Seedlings Room and the toys, the classroom with all its books, and the front porch and huge backyard are all free and open to anyone who wants to use them.  There are no barriers here (except for the stairs, unfortunately) or secret codes.  Everyone is welcome anywhere at this facility.   
 
The combination of kids is always changing – new kids arrive, some leave, others show up infrequently – the common denominator will always be their desire to be here. They come from all walks of life, with unique perspectives and ideologies, and they are each dealing with various difficult circumstances.  Nevertheless, even within all those differences, they recognize kindred spirits here and allow their defense mechanisms to relax. We all get to know each other on a deep level because we have the time, space, and freedom to do that.  We all feel safe to open up and share our fears, dreams, aspirations, and our past experiences. 
 
Absolutely, yes, it is these amazing, open, and inspirational kids; however, it is also the foundational philosophy that allows for those things to happen.  They understand clearly that no one will judge them, and that our one rule – respect yourself, each other and this place - will always stand. They know they will never be forced to do something they do not want to do.  They also understand that we appreciate each of them for who they are, and for the gifts, they bring to the community. 

Therefore, when the inevitable question pops up during intake meetings or phone calls - asking how many days their child would have to attend the Center each week - my answer will always be, “we are building a community here, and if your child is not here often enough, they will eventually feel like they are not part of that community; however, with that consideration, they are free to come as often as they would like or can.” 
 
The DRC community is welcoming, organic, and flexible, and will always reflect the people who are here on any given day, including visitors and volunteers.  This is why I can always look forward to the awesomeness of tomorrow – knowing that it will never be the same as today.   

Staff

The DRC staff has experienced some changes. Christopher Raymo, after a brief leave of absence, has resigned for personal reasons.  We miss him greatly and wish him well in his endeavors.
 
I am excited to announce that Elian Erickson, has joined the DRC staff.  He will be with us every day and is looking forward to being a member of the DRC community and specifically facilitating math and science classes and one-on-one sessions.  Stay tuned for an in-depth profile of Elian in the next couple of weeks. This was made possible through the St Lawrence County One-Stop Career Center and their program to place young adults in work-sites around the County to gain valuable skills for future employment.  I am beyond grateful that Elian brought this amazing program to my attention.

Exploration Station Suite of Extended Services

February Break - Register your child today!
 
Afternoon Programs – drop in options are available – register here.
 
Snow day coverage – DRC facilities and staff will be available for local school snow days – per day fees apply.  Learn more here.

Sap Run (walk) 5 & 10K
 
Deep Root Center and The Yoga Loft are teaming up to co-sponsor this 5 & 10K run (walk) to be held on March 28th at the Remington Trail in Canton.  Play on joining us and register online.  Your registration fee benefits both The Yoga Loft and Deep Root Center.

Do you first notice the effort, or errors?

Do you recognize the growth, or only see the immaturity?

Is their pain visible to you, or do you only note, and then emphasize their behaviors?

Do you focus on the potential, or do you obsess over the problems?

Can you gratefully accept a challenge, or will you throw up your hands in defeat?

Do you detect the beauty within imperfection, or will you discard it like trash?

Do you question why a five-year-old needs a special room at school to de-stress, or do you accept that pressure is an essential part of life for even the youngest among us?

Do you wonder why coercion is an immense component of our culture, or do you accept it as inevitable?

Your perspective is a powerful tool. Those initial interpretations will automatically determine your response, as well as the impact you will have on someone’s life.

Will you be an agent of affirmation, possibilities, empathy, and change, or will you be a curator of the status quo?

DRC News
 
Have you checked out the DRC Exploration Station Suite of extended services?  If your family needs programming in the afternoon, during school breaks, or on snow days we are here for you.

You and I, each, have opinions formed from our experiences and personal understanding, or perceptions of the world around us.  Those convictions, however, give neither of us permission, nor an obligation to place judgment on each other, or anyone else for their life choices and beliefs and ideologies.
 
This may seem like a pretty straightforward concept; nevertheless, our culture is over-run with criticism, and overwrought, moral outrage in response to other people who are simply living their everyday lives.  We seem to think that it is okay to judge, and yes, shame, someone for the clothes they wear, the way they style their hair, their body type or size, the color of their skin, the type of foods they eat (or don’t eat), how they spend their money (whether they are poor or not), how they earn their money, the house they live in, the type of pets they own, the number of children they have, including their reproductive choices, their gender identity and sexual preferences, the God, or Gods they worship, along with their spiritual beliefs, all the way to their method and approach to learning, as well as the choices they make to educate themselves and their family.  
 
This serves as a reminder; as long as no part of someone’s physicality, lifestyle, or personal life choices are actively or potentially going to harm another, we have absolutely no responsibility, duty, or reason to place judgement on that person’s life.  It is quite simply none of our business. The end!
 
Despite the seeming finality of that last exclamation, the above was just the beginning of my thought processes around judgment.  All those assessments that we hand out, heedlessly, are based purely on our personal biases.  Our thoughtless evaluations are the foundation for the indiscriminate assignations we place on people.   What we can’t seem to grasp is that those insidious labels do irreparable harm.
 
Once a label is designated within your mind - not only will you begin to treat that person by their assigned tag – but others will too.  Fairly quickly, everyone will recognize that person by their label, including the individual themselves.  You know on a profound level that this happens all the time – you hear about the bad kid, the violent kid, the troubled teen, or the LD kid. “He is 5 and can’t read!” “He can’t focus or sit still in the classroom!” “They can’t seem to follow the instructions.” “She is provocative - she wears leggings and camisoles.”  Or, “They must be troubled - they refuse to go to school – are gender non-conforming - have tattoos, piercings, and weird hair - listen to rap and Hip-Hop - play computer games – are on their phones all day - and … you do know who their older brother is – right ...”
 
The labels follow them wherever they go.  It is especially hard to outrun your designated status, here in the NoCo, with our minuscule population, where everyone either knows (is related to), or has heard of you and your family. 
 
Eventually, the child (teen) adopts the persona that has been, so handily, imposed upon them. In their minds, they really are the “bad,” “dumb,” or “worthless” kid, which in addition to becoming anxious, depressed, and completely overwhelmed, gives them the excuse to behave accordingly. And, then, we scratch our heads and try to “solve” the “problem,” that we in essence have created for them, by reinforcing their personally held convictions, with coercive and controlling methodologies and programs.  
 
We are all guilty of this!  Which is the main reason I tell families that I don’t want to see school records.  I don’t want to hear about the labels that have been assigned to their child. In my estimation, they are nothing more than a rap sheet that, I know, will unconsciously affect my perceptions and the way I work with that child.

Through my daily interactions and conversations, and weekly mentoring sessions, I spend an enormous amount of time trying to erase the closely held, damaging beliefs kids have about themselves, and replace those with positive affirmations.  “You are awesome.” “The way your brain works is genius.”  “You have great ideas.”  “Your artwork is brilliant.” “I am so proud of the way you handled that situation.”  “I really like how you stuck with it, and worked that out for yourself.”  “I couldn’t figure that out, but you did.”  “I am glad that you were willing to help X with that project.”  “That hack was amazing. I am glad you showed me.” “You can do anything that you put your mind too.” “You were incredibly kind, and thoughtful just now.”  Or, simply, “thank you for being you - I appreciate you.”
 
My greatest hope is that my encouraging messages and observations will take hold, before they harm themselves, someone else, or do something illegal, because of those internalized convictions, and face extreme consequences within our society.   My dominant fear is that my efforts will be too late.
 

DRC News

Don’t miss out! DRC is extending our Exploration Station afternoon programming to the February School Break – 2/17-21.  Drop-in options are available, as well as extended afternoon programming.  Check it out here, and register today!

The one definitive thing I have learned over the past six years of providing a non-coercive, non-compulsory learning environment is that when people have the opportunity to make their own choices, the decisions they make are not necessarily the ones I would have suggested, or even anticipated, based on the information I was working with.  In gifting free choice, I have relinquished all control over other people’s life. I can, and will, make observations and suggestions, but in the end, I understand clearly, that each person is in charge of their own life.

This comes with the knowledge that another person’s decisions may, very well, directly affect my reality. This means I will get disappointed, discouraged, and generally bummed on occasion (a few in the last couple of weeks).  Nevertheless, I recognize (after the initial reflexive response to the punch in the gut) that fighting the outcomes and responding with frustration and anger will only make it harder to deal with in the end.   

Ultimately, I have decided to trust in the power, and bequests, of Mother Universe. I know without a doubt that she is looking out for all of us.  When I can step back, accept, and go with the flow – I can anticipate the amazing opportunities, hidden within all those disappointments and hurts, that Serendipity, in all her wisdom, is working on behind the scenes, just waiting for the perfect circumstances to bestow on each of us.  

For most of us, the piece that requires us to adjust our perspective before we can recognize the advantages of the path to which we have been redirected - is the element behind our resistance.

Sometimes, we need the reminder that the ability to adapt and move on with new information, is the evolutionary advantage that makes us human.